We hear about Swayamwar in ancient Hindu marriage. Brides decided whom to marry through the Swayamwar. There was no Swayamvadhu where in the Groom could hold a beauty pageant to decide which bride to marry. Instead, it was the girl who through Swayamwar judged the competing bridegrooms through various contests and then selects the bridegroom whom she liked.
Let’s now talk about the times when Lord Ram and Goddess Sita were born. They were born in the ‘Treta Yuga’, before Lord Krishna, who was born in the ‘Dwapara Yuga’. The trend of Swayamwar existed since then, because of which the modern people have started following it and made a mockery of this tradition.
In the Swayamwar of Sita, Lord Ram had to lift Lord Shiva’s bow to prove that he was eligible to marry Sita.
Thus, this was the importance given to women in ancient India. But where has this respect for women disappeared? And where did this menace of dowry came into being?
What is the history behind the origin of dowry? Was Indian society always oppressive about its women population?
We pray for Goddess first before any Lord. We consider Saraswati as the Goddess of knowledge, not Brahma; Lakshmi as the Goddess of wealth, not Vishnu.
We even don’t find any instances of dowry in the ancient India. So, when did the Indian society sat in the lap of this evil demon ‘Dowry’ which has created social problems in the present Indian society.
The modern definition of dowry:
‘Dowry is the payment of cash or any other valuable gifts given in demand to the bridegroom’s family upon marriage’.
The problem of dowry has risen from past so many years. Inspite of the Laws that the Government has laid down, no strong action is taken whenever a Bride and her parents are encircled with this demon.
Well yes, the system of dowry existed in India before the British rule, but it wasn’t the way, we have in the society today. Earlier the parents of the bride used to give a part of their property to their daughters just as the sons used to get a share. Most importantly, the wealth that was given to the bride was not owned by the husband or his family.
But, where did this system take a wrong turn?
It was when the Britishers made a rule that female will have no share in the ancestral property. This gave birth to a new dowry system.
The dowry system in India has become worst from past so many years. The Bride and her parents are considered as Bank Saving accounts by the bridegroom’s family.
A verbal contract is accepted. The groom’s family keeps demanding for all the riches and wealth, and the poor parents of the bride keeps fulfilling, just for their daughter’s happy married life and not to be missed ‘the big society’.
I still don’t have an answer to, why does the girl’s parent think about the society as whole and not about themselves and their daughter’s life. If you think, fulfilling the demands of the Groom’s family will at last keep your daughter happy. Then I am sorry, you are thinking wrong. By this your daughter will never be happy, rather they will keep blackmailing you, either pay us more or take your daughter away.
India is a developing country, with educated professionals. They too demand dowry and follow its footsteps, they are educated yet illiterate!!
Then, why do we follow this way back tradition, till it is not followed on good terms. Dowry was actually started for some reason, but it has taken a shape of a demon. We cannot bring this practice to the same shape from where it started, but the only way is to eradicate completely for a peaceful life.
We as the responsible citizens of India need to kill this demon. After all, for a good wife, why should it matter if she gets loads of gifts in her wedding for herself and not for the family? Ain’t it?